Mom influencer Avery Woods sparked a boymom trend on TikTok. She confessed in a video how much she loves her son and received a lot of criticism
Boymom – a toxic trend
TikTok is now home to a phenomenon that has been around for some time: boymoms. These are mothers who favor their sons over their daughters. Unhealthy mother-son relationships are often portrayed as something special, which promotes the normalization of such dynamics. However, this not only negatively affects the sons involved, but also the other children in the family.
- Under the hashtag boymom, mothers show their affection for their sons. There are 18 million posts on Instagram alone. According to the New York Times, TikTok videos on this topic have reached over 31 billion views
- Vlogger Anna Saccone also published a TikTok video that was met with fierce criticism. Saccone is known for her popular YouTube channel. She regularly presents her children there. In the TikTok video, the mother of four spoke about her only son. Her youngest has a special meaning for her, although she loves all children equally, Saccone said.
- She admitted to favoring her son. She would not hold transgressions against him, whereas her daughters would be punished for them. Even when the son beats his sisters, the mother makes excuses. And although Saccone is well aware of her missteps, she makes fun of them.
- The uploaded video sparked a wave of criticism. However, Saccone responded with further videos in which she lets her daughters know how important they are. Whether she is serious or just trying to gain more attention through provocative content is irrelevant.
- Through her behavior, the mother supports sexist attitudes towards her daughters and publicly promotes toxic relationships between mothers and sons. The consequences of this phenomenon are toxic masculinity and misogyny.
- One user commented in response to the video that this type of relationship tends not to set boundaries. Others find the term boymom inappropriate, especially when there is another child – namely a girl.
- Many critics call the behavior toxic and find it strangely alienating. Some make fun of it in their own videos and mock the toxic boymoms. One example: An adult son is not allowed to celebrate Thanksgiving with his wife because mom didn’t allow it.
Boymom – not an unknown phenomenon
Toxic attachments develop in the son’s early childhood and are significantly influenced by the mother’s behavior. These mothers leave their children little room to develop an individual personality. This can not only have a negative impact on the child’s mental health, but can also significantly impair their future life development.
- Boymoms manipulate, are more than caring and control their sons. Many of them also exhibit narcissistic behaviors. They do not see their son as an independent person. He serves as an extension of the mother’s ego.
- Boymoms set high standards. If their child does not meet them, they are punished. They also tend to rarely apologize for their own mistakes. Instead, they blame their sons.
- The causes of such mother-son relationships can be highly intertwined. Some mothers are afraid of losing control over certain situations. Therefore, they try to control every aspect of their child’s life.
- Another reason may lie in the woman’s social life. If she has few caregivers or is going through a separation, she may see her son as a substitute for missing relationships.
- Other women may have grown up in families where boys and men were favored. They continue this cycle because they have not learned otherwise.
